I had sex with another man while my husband slept. Is he right to be furious? | Life and style

My husband and I are in an open relationship (both male, married for eight years) and on recent vacation, we started to explore group sex. We had a wonderful trio where we both felt well after and had mutual attraction for the other man – who is rare for us. However, our last company did not succeed.

We invited a couple and a single man to our hotel room. Everything was great during the five, And then the couple left. We invited the other man to spend the night (mainly led by me). In the morning, things between me and that The man started to warm up. He went to the toilet and I asked my husband if he wanted to participate, which he said no and that he prefers to sleep. Anyway, I continued with The man for a short period until we have reached his peak.

After his departure, my husband was extremely angry with me. It was not a border we had discussed, and I apologized. However, part of me has the impression It is not as bad as it makes me feel. He has I punished me with silence, distance and an expectation of draining myself throughout. I also have the impression that he uses it as an excuse for his own bad behavior to hide communication with other men. Our agreement is to be frank and honest on everything we presentbut He has a story of hide and delete sext messages, And in general is quite closed by his feelings. Am I morally in evil here? And Is there hope for us in the relationship?

I cannot be a judge of morality, but what I can say is that any open relationship requires a lot of frankness, negotiation and respect for the feelings of the other. Obviously, as often happens with couples, there is a difference between your understanding of what was acceptable during group sex and that of your husband. The finest points should really be discussed in detail as soon as possible.

But even if a couple discusses all kinds of scenarios which, according to them, could occur, it is always easy to be taken by surprise by new situations and feelings that occur unexpectedly and create troubles. You seem to have a good idea and you have now learned that for your husband, each new situation requires that you verify yourself with him.

People who are Alexithymic (who find it difficult to express emotions) have a lot of difficulty informing others when they are uncomfortable of something and may require an incentive. In the fire of the moment, it can be easy to forget that, but he clearly indicated that he was important to him. If you want to continue to include other people to have sex with relative emotional security, stay in touch with your intuition and wander on the side of caution.

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