‘SNL’ Cold Open has Jost’s Hegseth dodging Iran questions

As confusion and fear rage over the U.S.-Iran war, Saturday Night Live takes the opportunity to inject some levity into it. This week, Weekend Update host Colin Jost returned as Secretary of War Pete Hegseth to give a press conference about the ongoing conflict.

The fratty Hegseth first appeared doing a “hegstand” with “Sprite” (wink wink) before combatively engaging with the media. “We’re treating Iran like the breathalyzer in my car and blowing it the hell up,” said Jost’s Hegseth. He denies that what’s happening is a war, instead calling it a “situationship,” and makes a “your mom” joke rather than answering whether they’ll actually have boots on the ground.

Fired Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem also made an appearance, played by Ashley Padilla, to give a sendoff.

“I just want to make it clear that I didn’t get fired,” Noem said. “I self-deported.”