Japanese bear-fightin’ robo-wolves are pure unleaded nightmare fuel but they’re working
There’s so much going on in the world that it’s really hard to stay on top of everything. However, one thing I can’t believe isn’t talked about more is Japan’s problem with bear attacks.
In fact, the situation got so bad that they turned to robotic wolves to deal with it.
Killer bears versus wolf robots? Don’t touch everyone. I’m writing the screenplay for what will surely be a Syfy channel film movie from the channel if you haven’t already.
A sign warning people that there are bears in the area. (Photo by ANDREW CABALLERO-REYNOLDS / AFP)
Bear encounters are on the rise in Japan, with 200 injuries and 13 deaths reported since the start of 2025. The situation has gotten so bad that, according to Popular Science, they’ve even had to deploy the military to solve the problem.
JAPAN DEPLOYS MILITARY AFTER RECORD BEAR ATTACKS ACROSS THE COUNTRY
Maybe someone was watching “Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla” and Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla and I thought, “Hey, let’s launch some robots to solve this problem.”
They did, and it turned out to be the secret weapon. Monster Wolf, a $4,000 robot with sensors and sound effects designed to scare away bears, deer and, from the looks of it, anything else it wants.
Because it might be the scariest thing I’ve ever seen.
Did they have to go so hard?
I think you can scare off most animals by hitting a tree trunk with a stick; you don’t need a robotic version of one of Cerberus’ heads.
I mean, yeah, no one seems to know what to do when a bear attacks. Some say we curl up into a ball, others say we make ourselves big. Some say you stay quiet, while others say you throw an air horn in his face.
ZERO BS. JUST DAKICH. TAKE THE DON’T @ ME PODCAST ON THE ROAD. DOWNLOAD NOW!
Monster Wolf has been around since 2016, but has recently evolved into a tool to ward off bears, and can you blame bears for not wanting to go near this thing? (Photo by Richard Atrero de Guzman/NUR Photo)
So, after centuries – maybe millennia – of not knowing what to do when a bear attacks you, Leonardo DiCaprio in ‘The Revenant’The ghost on you, it turns out the answer was simple: robot wolves.
Terrifying robot wolves that we will all see in our sleep tonight.
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I mean, imagine going on a hike and coming across this. You would have liked to have been mauled by a bear.
But there is a problem. They seem to be working, and since each Monster Wolf is custom made, they’re having trouble keeping up with demand.
